


Everybody Hurts

by VitaLupum



Category: Marble Hornets
Genre: Angst, Gen, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-11
Updated: 2013-06-11
Packaged: 2017-12-14 15:58:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/838700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VitaLupum/pseuds/VitaLupum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Now it's time to sing along. Song is Everybody Hurts by REM, from the album Automatic For The People, 1992</p>
            </blockquote>





	Everybody Hurts

            Jay and Tim are driving back from the latest (wild-goose-chase) Alex sighting. They got there, they found nothing, and they came back; except this time, they had an argument. It was nothing, at first, but then words were said that were a little more cruel. Tim accused Jay of abandoning his friends for the sake of a few more seconds of footage. Jay accused Tim of being an emotionally-dead punch-first-question-later idiot. Tim punched Jay. Jay called him a fucking psychopath.

            Now they’re driving back in silence. Jay is almost asleep in the stuffy car, leaning towards the window, which he has been staring out of since they went to drive back.

            The radio is playing old hits, Tim having just hit the ‘Seek’ button until something drowned out the shouting in his head. He’s never felt so down, so depressed. Jay was the only one who came after him, and as far as he knew, he was the only one Jay really went after; his half-assed search for Jessica nothing compared to Jay’s frantic search for him in Rosswood. He regrets those words. Maybe he is a psychopath. Maybe Jay would be better off if Tim were to just kill himself.

_When the day is long-♫_

            Tim groans, and goes to switch it off, he’s never really liked REM… but something makes him keep it on.

_-and the night,_  
 _the night is yours alone-♫_

            As the music washes over him, Tim feels even more miserable. Are they listing every feeling he’s ever had? He  _is_  sure he’s had enough of this life, he knows that…

_-and you’re sure you’ve had enough of this life_

_Hang on.♫_

For  _what?_

_Don’t let yourself go…_

_Because everybody cries…_  
 _Everybody hurts-_  
 _Sometimes-♫_

            Do they? He’s never known anybody who hurts as much as he does, and a tear slides down his face.

_Sometimes everything is wrong.♫_

            All the time. Everything was fucking wrong. It hurt.

 _Now it’s time to sing along._ ♫

            Despite the fact he hates this band ever since his cousin played him Losing My Religion eighteen times in successions, Tim does find himself singing along, despite the lump in his throat.

_-When your day is night alone,_

_If you feel like letting go-♫_

            He does. He always has done. He’s tried it so many times, and each time he is placed back in that cold comfortable hospital ward, with the smiling nurses and the wristbands that measure your pulse and the numbing inevitability of living your wretched life in there instead. His days are nights, and the nights are darker than anyone could imagine, and stretch into forever.

_-if you think you’ve had too much_ _  
_of this life-♫_ _

            Jay glances sideways, a loud sniffle waking him up a little, and he sees with a shock that Tim is actually crying as they drive back into the orange sunset. Is it because of their argument?

_Hang on.♫_

            Shit. What is protocol in this situation? The only other time he’s ever seen Tim cry was Entry #61, after his seizure, and even that was a desperate, childish sobbing, full of the need to be comforted. This is silent, poisonous tears that are escaping through cracks in a dam that has gone  _far_  too long without repair.

_Everybody hurts_

_Take comfort in your friends._

_Everybody hurts-♫_

            He sees Tim mouth ‘sometimes’, voice a hoarse crackle through the pain that he’s trying to hold back, and then look confused when the song changes.

_Don’t throw your hand._

_Oh, no,_

_Don’t throw your hand._

_If you feel like you’re alone, no, no, no-♫_

            Jay sits up, not even pretending to be asleep, and Tim ignores him, still singing along in that reedy little crackling voice of absolute pain and sorrow.

_You’re not alone.♫_

            “Tim, I’m… sorry,” Jay mumbles, and Tim shakes his head.

            “Maybe you’d be better off without me,” he whispers, and then he is crying so hard that he has to pull over and rest his head on the steering wheel, entire frame shaking with grief, as Jay sits and watches him, entirely unable to help. At length, the shaking stops, and Tim isn’t crying any more either. His breathing is harsh and pained, but he is not crying, and Jay puts his arm around him, praying that Tim doesn’t punch him again.

            “Tim, can I just say that listening to REM when you are upset is something everyone learns at thirteen not to do,” he says flatly, and Tim gives a snort of pained sad-laughter. “And secondly, no, I would not be better off without you.”

            “Why not?” Tim hiccups into the steering wheel, still not sitting up. “You heard the song. It was… Jay, my entire life is in that song.”

            “ _Everybody_  Hurts is the name of the song,” Jay reminded Tim. “Dude. You’re not alone, you have me, and vice versa. I know some of the pain.” Tim looks at him, brown eyes marbles of fear - fear that Jay will leave him alone, fear that Alex will take Jay from him, fear that the universe will realise Tim cannot have nice things and will take Jay away forever - and Jay hugs him, wondering how Tim can keep so much feelings bottled up.

            “Can we go home and not do  _anything_  Marble Hornets related?” Tim asks, sounding so tired and scared and childish that Jay nods immediately, and he sniffles. “Thank you.”


End file.
